Finding Hope at Christmas: How small acts of love brought hope and comfort

For many people, Christmas is the most wonderful time of year. They revel in the warmth, decorations, gatherings, and traditions. But for some, Christmas can be very hard. For many years, Christmas was an incredibly difficult season for me. You see, my mother passed away three days after Christmas when I was six years old. 

That One Christmas

Even before that fateful holiday season, Christmas had been hard. We were living in poverty. My sister and I were in and out of our home, bouncing between home and foster care. Our father had passed away a few years ago. My mother struggled to care for herself and us. Christmas was not something we did. 

Then that one Christmas came. We were sitting in the car in the parking lot of a restaurant. My mother started coughing and then all was silent. We didn't know it at the time, but she had had a massive heart attack and passed away. As a shy, scared six-year-old, I had no idea what was going on. It was a blur of people and noises. I do remember the police officer coming and telling my older sister and myself what had happened. My sister cried, but again I didn't realize what was going on. 

The Tooth Fairy

I remember we spent the next few days with a family. I didn't know them, but they had a house that was clean and warm. They even had a Christmas tree. In the chaos and confusion, it felt safe.

During this time, I lost a tooth. To a six-year-old, this was a very important development. The mom of the family showed me how to place my tooth under my pillow that night and explained the tooth fairy would come. When I woke up in the morning and lifted my pillow, I found a felt, tooth-shaped case holding my tooth and a quarter. I was elated! The case had a face stitch with pink thread and a pink border.  It was mine - the first thing I could remember that was truly mine. 

Christmas Memories

As the years went on, I bounced from home to home. Each Christmas came and went. Some years were easier than others, but I always felt out of place in each home. The holidays seem to exaggerate the fact that I was not in a home with my parents.  I was a short-term or long-term visitor.

Despite these feelings, there were times - just like my visit from the tooth fairy, that made me feel loved and wanted. A friend from school invited me to every holiday celebration at their church. Or a neighbor took me along with her grandson to a holiday light display. Then there was the year when I was fifteen, and my English teacher gave me a Christmas book with a special message inscribed on the cover. 

Making Christmas Special

Each of these may seem like a small, insignificant thing, but for a child in foster care, they meant the world to me. I longed to have something of my own. And if it was made or given with me in mind, it became even more special. 

So, this holiday season, as you decorate, gather, and celebrate I challenge you to think of ways you could make a child in foster care feel special. Maybe it is making ornaments and donating them to an agency, purchasing items from a wish list or toy drive, or asking if your church has any families that are fostering and finding out if the kids have any needs or desires. A simple act or gift from you could mean the world of difference to a child in foster care, just like it did for me.